Rain
by Anae-chan
Summary: Both Leon and Cloud hate rain. To both of them, it resembles something that was lost long ago and ain't coming back. But they're lucky enough to have someone by their side. Someone who understands.


_Title__: _Rain  
_Author__: _Anae  
_Beta__: _Eep. I have none, for the first time in my life. So mistakes are mine.  
_Fandom__: _Kingdom Hearts  
_Characters/pairing__: _Leon/Cloud  
_Rating__: _PG-13  
_Spoilers__: _I'd say none. There's just a little of Squall's past, but nothing in detail enough to be a spoiler, I think.  
_Disclaimer__: _I don't own Kingdom Hearts.  
_Summary__: _Both Leon and Cloud hate rain. To both of them, it resembles something that was lost long ago and ain't coming back. But they're lucky enough to have someone by their side. Someone who understands.  
_A/N__: _This was written ages ago. Just happened to find it in the depths of my computer and thought that I might as well share. Hope you like! :  
_Feedback: _Needed, and loved.

_A soft hand ruffled brown locks. The small boy shivered in the coldness of rain, tilting his head more to give his best - and only - friend a better access. "Don't go", he mumbled._

_The girl sighed, biting her lip, looking down to the child, putting up a brave face. "I have to."_

"_Why?"_

_She turned her head to gaze the men, scary ones, dressed in all black, standing a few feet away. The boy couldn't see their faces, nor hers, but… "I can't explain", she told him quietly._

_It was the first time she kept a secret from him._

"_I'm sorry", she added and turned away._

_Only to be hugged backwards by a desperate, lonely and scared little child. "Don't go", the brunette boy pleaded, sobbing. "Please, Sis."_

_She turned again, this time towards the boy and kneeled to boy's height. "Don't cry", she told him, hand running through his hair again - a gesture of affection they had shared so many times. "I'll cry too."_

_He sniffled and nodded, and before he could do anything else, Sis stood up and once again turned away. "I'm sorry, Squall", she whispered. "I'm sorry."_

_Then she was gone, swallowed by the darkness called the world._

_And the boy she left behind stood in the rain for a long time. The cold water was enough to turn his fingers numb, but it was kind enough to hide his tears. But those freezing droplets started were cruel - they touched the child's heart, giving it push towards the edge - starting to freeze the kind heart._

_As the darkness called loneliness and fear swallowed the boy, he screamed the only name that could've saved him._

"_Sis!"_

_But no one was there._

A figure shot up on the bed, into a sitting position. The body was of the brunette was rigid, the man was sweating, shaking uncontrollability. Leon drew a deep breath, fighting against his ragged breathing.

All due to one nightmare.

Or, to be more precise, one memory.

Breathing out the air in his lungs shakily, Leon ran his fingers through the brown locks - longer than back then - much like Sis had long ago. Before she…

Before the painful memories swallowed young man - not a boy, let alone a child anymore - a small light was lit somewhere in the darkness of the room. As Leon's hand cowered his eyes - in which the fear of memories still burned - he searched for the light and it's litter.

Tired blue-grey eyes met exhausted enchanted sky blue, and spiky-haired blonde moved across the room to sit on the bed beside Leon.

Awoken eyes however did not follow the movements of the man they had come to rest upon so often - this time they looked behind him, behind the light, right through the window, straight to the dead of night.

It rained. Water droplets ran across the window, painting it over and over again with painful memories, hidden somewhere deep in mind - but not forgotten. Never forgotten.

"That dream again?"

The eyes, captivated by the cold droplets of water, didn't give their attention to the speaker. But it didn't mean he would be ignored - a short nod and quiet hum in return was the given answer.

Leon's eyes were on the rain, but his mind lingered in the past. The rain reminded him of the time when Sis had left the orphanage. Without any explanation, she had left, leaving lonely boy all alone, causing him to close himself up and build walls around his heart.

Sis had been so dear to Squall, the only one that had cared about him, the only one that had loved him. And in return, he had loved her as well.

And when she had left, she had taken Squall's heart with her, leaving the young orphan boy - unable to remember his parents - with aching loneliness now that the comfort she had provided was gone.

Thus, the suffocating fear of losing someone was planted in Squall. He never wanted to be swallowed by that darkness of loneliness and fear again - so he closed the world outside, along with it's people.

And even if the name had been changed, the person had grown older, wiser even, the loneliness and fear, no matter how much he hoped, pleaded, begged, hated, screamed… they did not go away.

That creature called fear - it had made it's home to his heart, sitting on the side of it, grinning. It played with the keys of Leon's closed heart - and it had no intentions of giving them back to the heart's owner - no, this heart belonged to it - let alone to someone else.

Feather light touch of the battle toughened hand woke Leon up from his reverie. Cold fingers were running across Leon's sweat-cold arm, soothing, trying to push the negative feelings away with kindness. Just by looking Cloud, the gunblader could see the concern written on those handsome features.

Leon didn't try to push it off by putting up a pathetic lie that he was fine - Cloud knew him well enough to see the opposite truth. And the gunblader was no liar, he had been deceived enough to know how much damaged it caused to one's trust in people. He didn't want to see anyone else's trust, and heart along with it, being eaten by the spider controlling those webs of lies.

Besides, Cloud knew about the nightmare - after waking up in almost every rainy night cowered in cold sweat, the blonde had opened his mouth and asked. Leon had been determined not to tell - he didn't like to talk about his past, even if it was his lover - but when he was about to tell the other to mind his own business, he noticed the pure worry lingering in the blonde's eyes and voice.

So Leon had told him everything there was to tell.

And he hadn't regretted it. Ever.

In silence, Leon reached out for his lover, letting himself search for comfort of the other's presence. The brunette gently, slowly brushed over his cheek, finally reaching the damp blonde hair.

Leon's mind stopped there, but his hand moved to touch the cold, somewhat dry skin of the exposed neck.

He should've known.

As Cloud realised Leon had figured it out, apologizing mako-enchanted blue met conscious blue-grey.

"You've been out."

The tone wasn't accusing nor was it questioning. It was simple statement of what he'd done.

Cloud's gaze shifted to sheets on his side. No word was said, but Leon knew why, since Cloud hadn't been the only one to pry why his lover woke up, shaking and desperately trying to get a hold of his breathing - it occasionally happened to the blonde, which was no surprise, the man's past considered - but there was no rainy night it didn't occur.

And like Leon, Cloud had spoken the truth.

"_It rained when Zack died."_

Zack, who had dragged Cloud, suffering from mako-poisoning, through half of the world. Zack, who had refused to leave Cloud behind. And for that, the SOLDIER had paid the high price for - if he had escaped on his own, he would've been alive.

But the raven haired youth hadn't done so, so the only thing Cloud had left of him, besides the Buster Sword, was a memory of a dearest friend, dying on the hill as rain cruelly poured down - stealing what was left of the warmth of his saviour. And the knowledge - among with shame and longing - that his death was your fault. Yours alone.

And no power in the world would change that burning, blaming trail of thoughts.

"Did you sleep at all?"

Cloud shook his head, hand gripping the sheets - desperately trying to push the memories, that still, even after all these years, pierced your heart and made sure it never stopped bleeding. "Didn't even try."

Leon sighed and his eyes shifted to look beyond the dim light again - straight to the darkness of night. The rain wasn't ending - the sounds of it hitting the roof was clear now - it was growing it's powers, only to be able to torture the men through the night.

Both Leon and Cloud hated rain - hated that it awoke their memories and ripped their hastily patched wounds open, over and over again. To Leon, rain water slipping through your fingers represented the loved ones he had been unable to protect - everything he had lost. To Cloud, the rain running through yours fingers wasn't water but blood. Blood of a loved one that died because of him.

In silence, the men shifted closer to each other.

As the dark night and rain droplets embraced their home - the only shelter between them and the cruel world - they embraced each other, drowning themselves on the arms of someone who was there, who wasn't going anywhere.

Somewhere along the night, Leon fell asleep. Cloud didn't, but he didn't move. Leon's hands were wrapped around his chest, the warrior's head resting on his shoulder. Cloud's hands were running through the scarred back of the older warrior, messy blond head touching other's. Focusing only on the man on his arms, he could almost ignore the mercilessly down-pouring rain behind the window and the one in his memories.

To lone warriors - experienced and lost as much as they had - it was a comfort beyond imagination.


End file.
